A very wise friend of mine wrote on this subject so I will start this blog using some of her words: (with grateful thanks)

But first of all, what does ‘severing the cord’ really mean?

Basically, in our lives we often and regularly make ‘connections’ with other people. This can be in all walks of life. From family, friends, acquaintances, colleagues etc.

Usually in the beginning you are very enthusiastic about the connection. You know almost instinctively that your paths have crossed for a reason. It can be the beginning of a short or a very long connection. Sometimes life-long. As a little bit of an exception to this are the connections we make within our families. Firstly, our parents, grandparents, and siblings as well as cousins, aunts, and uncles. These are so-called blood connections, but it doesn’t always say that these almost bonded connections will last forever.

In my blog I want to talk about a connection I made myself with a person. Quite by chance a meeting somewhere and an almost instantaneous form of recognition. I knew afterwards I just knew that I had to meet this person again. It was definitely not a romantic connection, just in case you are wondering, more a past-life connection.

And that is exactly what happened, a second, third, fourth meeting and suddenly lives are entwined. The cord is connected but what happens when you suddenly realize that you now have to sever that cord. That connection that felt so right for such a long time, but suddenly it feels toxic and wrong.

This is what my wise friend wrote:

If there is one thing that I have learnt in the past year, it’s better to say goodbye in love than in anger or even revenge. Let me put it another way: I am not saying goodbye, but I am just leaving it where it belongs; in the past. Basically, I understand it, but the person that I am feels sad because it’s never nice if you don’t understand and only listen to the many stories that the ego makes up to give it a reason. Sometimes there isn’t any tangible reason, but life just follows another path. So, just leave one another whole. The bruise on the ego will heal again, the wound in the heart knows the blessing of time and the soul doesn’t have any opinion other than love.

Soft love because you are able to look way beyond all the fuss. I even place all the sadness into the hands of God. Because God has a bigger brain than I do, and I whisper a soft prayer ‘open new paths for me that bless the path which has been walked’.

Do you know why? If you go to bed feeling angry and your soul releases your body in a sleeping packaging, then you don’t want to saddle yourself in the angry dreams of the lower frequencies, do you? A person is a bit like an iPhone, the majority of updates are uploaded in the night. Walk on courageously, be wise and stay within your own wisdom.

So just a thought that I would like to share. Not as a ‘must’ or a ‘have to learn’ idea but just to inspire to leave one another whole. There is enough anger in the world isn’t there?

© Patty Harpenau

And yes, how true is this? It is not easy because of course you have to deal with all sorts of powerful emotions like rejection, anger, hurt, sadness, non-comprehension and so on.

This is exactly what I experienced. After a huge number of years and a serious almost business-like connection, pushed aside without a reason. Or I should really say, pushed aside with excuses (and even lies).

It was the words of my friend that gave me clarity. It doesn’t matter who you believe in or what your religion is, the name God only refers to a higher energy.

Why would you keep punishing yourself and keep the energy going in a connection which has just extinguished. By you or by them.

It is not easy believe you me, because the thoughts keep running around your mind, but there is a certain moment when you can pick up a very strong pair of scissors and literally cut the connection. When I did this, I felt a huge burden fall from my shoulders and I was reminded of one of my grandmother’s favorite sayings” ‘never be a doormat’!

A few days later I felt so much lighter and noticed that my thoughts had cleared. It no longer seemed important, and I wondered why I had actually spent so much time thinking about this in the first place. 

The world is a strange place at the moment, we can all agree on that, and that it is why it is so important to take steps to sever any connection which no longer feels right, and this applies to all walks of life.

Just ask yourself why would you keep battling on with a lost cause? Why would you choose to keep bashing your head against a brick wall? Not literally of course, this is just a saying. It means really why would you keep punishing yourself so harshly?

If you can accept it and let it go (and really do that) then you will suddenly find that a new door opens, one which you never could have imagined would. Offering new insights, new connections and the energy immediately begins to flow. There is no point whatsoever keep on standing still in a bad connection because you almost feel obliged to do so. It is as my friend wrote, much better to let it go and to leave one another whole. Revenge, bad thoughts, bad karma, it doesn’t matter. The other person will eventually be confronted with their actions or not. The universe moves as they say, sometimes in very mysterious ways. The most important thing is that you (or I in this case) walk away with pure thoughts and releasing with love. 

Nothing else matters.

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Jill Kramer

Hi! I'm Jill and I'm a passionate author of books, short stories, columns and blogs.

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