THE CURVED BALL

I have been quiet for a couple of days, mainly because someone in my immediate family received some very bad news last week. I am not going to go into details for privacy reasons and respect for the person concerned, but more about the idea in general. What you can do, think about and take action on, when someone (something) throws you a curved ball.

It is a bit of a vague expression, which basically means you are confronted with something you did not expect. And usually at the moment when you do not expect it either.

So, these are my thoughts. Whatever the content of the ‘news’ the most important thing is to try and remain calm. Try to write down your thoughts and questions, because when you receive bad news your mind tends to suddenly go blank and block off any more information. It is good to have someone with you, who then, takes over the conversation. Who can ask and listen, all the things you personally may not hear because of the pure shock.

Then the next full days will be a real roller coaster ride. Disbelief, shock, incredible sadness, anger, unfairness, the why me? And the list goes on. Firstly, let me say that tears of sadness are good because they release tension. So never be ashamed of that side. It is just as natural an emotion as laughing, in fact the other side and how many of you reading this have literally laughed until you cried! For some or other inexplicable reason, people seem ashamed to cry. Why? It gives an incredible release to feelings of sadness for starters. Look at how a child reacts if suddenly they fall over, they cry immediately and go looking for empathy and sympathy. A cuddle or reassurance that everything is perfectly fine. 

Unfortunately, there are a lot of people in this world who have problems showing emotions. 

We all feel that we have to keep on a mask of indifference. But for goodness sake take it off and show your emotions. Bottling them up will only lead to even more tension, stress, anxiety and feeling depressed and down. We are human after all and emotions are perfectly ok. It is normal to be scared, worried, wondering what happens next, how do I cope? How do we all cope?

The answers may not seem crystal clear immediately. There may not be any answers right away but the main thing when you catch this curved ball is to remember two words: Breathe (and focus on your breath) and Hope.  I often look up the true meanings of words: 

Breathing is one of our main bodily functions, we literally have to ‘breathe to stay alive’.

‘Hope is a feeling of expectation and desire for a particular thing to happen.’

To my mind HOPE is an interesting word. We must never stop having hope. Hope is a lifeline in times like this, that you always have a positive feeling that in some or other way, there is the chance of something happening. Preferably positive too.

Always try and find the positive as opposed to the negative.

Negative is a spiral going downwards. And once you start going down, the climb back up is very hard indeed.

I keep telling my own family that what has happened in the past is over. No one can change it. We live in the ‘here and now moment’ and don’t even know what tomorrow will even bring. But the most important thing is hope and trying to keep positive. Always.

And live each day with a renewed vigor of making the best of each and every day. We as humans love to all have a moan, about the weather, about our jobs, about everything really and that too is negativity. Even small little moans about totally insignificant things.

If I was asked what one positive thing that came because of the Covid-19 pandemic, then I would have to say, the fact that I started to appreciate the little things in life much more. I became more aware of the birds singing in the morning, actually seeing Spring with new eyes (mainly because I had so much more time). Enjoyed the peace and tranquility of my own home. Taking a rest from the rat race we all are normally part of each and every day. It also made me think how lucky I am. Material possessions are not really that important. I really did not miss the shops at all. I was just happy to be quiet and peaceful in myself. I read a huge number of books, worked hard on my own projects, continued to write on in my new book (publishing in the autumn) and sometimes do absolutely nothing but sit in the garden just enjoying the brighter blue skies (no planes or pollution). Watching our cat stretching lazily in the sun. Just little tiny things like that. A lot of other stuff became distant and actually totally unimportant. It has been a sad time for the entire world, and I realize and acknowledge that fact too.

Life is really about making the best of each and every moment. No matter how big the curved ball is that gets thrown at you. It is showing empathy as opposed to sympathy. Just being there for one another, through difficult times. That is what counts.

Finally, something else: July 2020 is what we call an 11 month. (you know 7+2+2=11) and this is a master number. It is the turning point of the year too. It could be a month when you receive more for yourself and your future than ever before.

Master numbers have a higher energy vibration. July seems to be holding some very powerful astrological energy as well. Spiritual expansion and rapid growth. This month is about ‘pulling up our pants’ and growing up. New era, new time, new chances, new choices. Experiences are going to be intensified for sure, but the 11-master number portal invites you to step on through the gate into a new moment. Sounds pretty good to me!

Taking each step at a time, never giving up on yourself or others, and always staying as positive as possible. Some things we thought were so important will be totally irrelevant now. Even if you may not think so, believe me you will when you reflect back. See the imprint you made.

That is how we are taking each day as a family. United, supporting, positive, being honest about our emotions and at all times never loosing HOPE.

I had put this blog to one side, to check again and fine tune and then someone sent me this message which I just have to include because it is so beautifully written and such inspiration to anyone who has been thrown a curved ball.

‘I truly respect people who stay strong during hard times. Even when they have every reason to break down. Never let the rough and tough times stop you from getting what you want in life and chasing your dreams. It is crazy how at times, the darkest moments are the truly beautiful ones. Some storms last longer than other storms but at the end of every storm, there is light. I think the assurance between a man and a woman in their relationship is the time they suffered together. It gets harder before it gets easier. You just need to make it through the hard stuff first and know that one day it will get better for good. It may be storming right now in your life but remember it cannot rain forever. I promise. I will never give up as long as I am breathing. As long as I am still standing, I will never give up! Go ahead and be the best imperfect person you can be and get started on those things you want to accomplish before you die. If you fear nothing, then there is nothing that can stop you from getting to the top. Fear is the enemy. Do not allow it to make you feel that you do not deserve the success you want. Because you do. What happened yesterday, no longer matters. Get back on the right track and move closer to your dreams. Yes, you can do it. People can do more than they ever believe they can do. Physically, mentally, academically. You have to be pushed, it hurts, but it is worth it and it’s a great element.

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined… You don’t have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great. My only relationship goal is someone who motivates me to become a better person and shows me the potential I don’t see in myself. Don’t let life put you down to the point that you can’t get up and proceed further. The life you are living now, all the hardships and trials; is just a testimony raising up to be told……’

Wow that is so beautiful !!! Special thanks to the author of these words!!!! Don’t you agree with me that they maybe missed their vocation, so it is a great honor for me to give these words a platform. Dear special person!!!

Images: Google

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Jill Kramer

Hi! I'm Jill and I'm a passionate author of books, short stories, columns and blogs.

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