As many of you know who are regularly reading my blogs, my passion is writing and recently I wrote this piece for a very good friend of mine who is going though some big changes in her life. At the time she was actually many miles away (on the other side of the world to be exact) and I felt inspired during our ‘whatsapp chats’ to put my thoughts into words for her.

She is making life-changing decisions, reaching a huge turning point in her life, where she is finally making choices for herself, despite the consequences. I actually read this out aloud at a gathering on Sunday in her home. As I came to the end, I saw that every single person in the room was extremely emotional. I think it struck a chord with everyone, so I thought I would share with you:


My dear friend,

Recently I saw a quote on social media that said:

‘If friendship lasts for more than 5 years, then you are more than friends, you are family’.

A beautiful sentiment: but to me this is completely opposite to the principle that you get your family, you choose your friends.

It’s something to think about isn’t it?

What does friendship mean to you? A good friend (masculine or feminine) is someone who listens, it doesn’t matter what you want to tell them, whatever it is about, they will always listen. Without any judgement, without comments, without giving you the feeling that you may have done something wrong. Because doing something wrong does not really exist.

Just remember, the thing about making mistakes is; that you did the best you could at the moment with the knowledge you had. There is never anything to reprimand or rebuke. We may make mistakes. We learn from them.

A friend is someone you can share everything with. Really everything. Your paths have not crossed without a reason. Even though we all may be on our own individual path, it is true that they often cross. No one is brighter, more beautiful, or smarter because they just happen to be a bit further along their path of development, we all do it in our own time. It does not matter: remember the journey is so much more important than the destination. It is not only a moment of learning, each day, each moment but also a moment to grow. To develop. If by chance we were all standing on the same path at the same time, there would be complete chaos.

How often in your life have you met someone, it does not matter if it is a man or a woman and you feel a special ‘click’ with them. Something that says within, this is good, this is right; You feel that you are connected with one another, whichever way that may be.

It is almost a sort of déjà-vu moment, just as if you have met one another before during another journey perhaps? It is difficult to put into words, but you just know within. You recognise them deep in your heart. Your soul just knows.

A friendship grows and quickly you feel that this is important for you. Age plays no role. You know within that it does not matter at all if you see one another each and every day or not, you still remain connected. Yesterday, today, tomorrow, forever.

Because real friendship is so pure, even if you have a difference of opinion, or even a row, nothing can destroy or stand in the way of your connection. You can always talk it out, explain, and make things good again.

Friends are really like stars, you don’t see them all the time, but you know they are there.

Friendship is important, never forget that. Friendship is like treasure, which you have been looking for over a long period of time and you finally find it. It gives you a feeling of freedom. Cherish it; this is something special, because real friendship is exactly that. Special, something to fight for, to talk about, to listen, to give advice but also to receive. A friendship has to be two ways.

Just to be. To be there for one another. Always!

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Jill Kramer

Hi! I'm Jill and I'm a passionate author of books, short stories, columns and blogs.

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