A DATING SITE? Is ‘Tinder’ your choice?


Yesterday quite by chance I got into a conversation with an aunt and niece about dating sites. To be perfectly honest I know absolutely nothing about them, apart from their existence and from commercials on TV.

The name Tinder is quite interesting for starters. According the Oxford English Dictionary, Tinder means:

‘A flammable material such as wood or paper, used for lightening a fire’

I found this amusing because if you are a member of Tinder are you the material for lightening someone’s passion, lust, love or what?

It was quite an eye-opener for me to be part of their search for the perfect partner. Apparently once you enrol and state your specifics, like age, gender, location and such like you receive a whole gallery of photos to choose from.

Oh the photos are funny in themselves. I seriously wonder why people post up such photos and men take note, women do not want to see you in sunglasses they want to see your face, look into your eyes to maybe judge if you are a match or not? Change your profile!

You go through your daily selection, a swipe to the left is immediately ‘binned’ as unsuitable, and a swipe to the right means, yes, interesting! Only when you get a sort of confirmation or ‘match back’, can you then start a conversation with one another and maybe arrange a date. In other words they think you look interesting too.

It all sounds horribly complicated and confusing to me! But as I said, I am a complete non-starter to dating sites. One thing that I do find irritating (and I only know this from the commercials is that there are some sites for highly educated people) What? Does it mean you are suddenly unsuitable if you don’t have some sort of degree? Degree in what I ask myself. I find this discriminating. Do we judge people these days on their intellect or how they are as people?

Anyway, back to Tinder. The niece told me that one of the first questions she asks is about the size and performance of their gear? She said she had recently had a match with a young Indonesian guy, so she had googled the size of men’s’ (you know what) who come from there! You can imagine over a glass of wine this became a hilarious discussion.

Is that the first priority then with the younger generation looking for a partner, the size and shape of the equipment? I see the gap between my age and hers thinking I would never ask that as my first question, but come on let’s get our priorities right! Perhaps I should wake up a bit on this score? Just in case you are wondering the smallest are in China about 11 cms long she said! What?

Actually I think people who put their profile up on Tinder and such like are quite brave. I can never imagine going on a date with someone through this media, but again it is the generation gap. Quite by chance there is a new programme on TV (from the UK where else?) where couples choose a potential partner based on observing their naked parts. I zapped off immediately to another channel. Some of the comments were unbelievable including one man who compared a girls’ intimate zone to a cheeseburger! Really? This is how you possibly choose a partner these days?? I am confused. Fast food à la but …

Anyway the upshot of yesterday was that I have never laughed so much in weeks.

Thank you to both of you for enlightening me on pros and con’s of Tinder. I don’t think I will be signing up !

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Jill Kramer

Hi! I'm Jill and I'm a passionate author of books, short stories, columns and blogs.

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