ARE YOU AN INFLUENCER OR JUST INFLUENCED?

I just happened to read a ‘heated’ discussion on someone’s Instagram post yesterday which made me think about this: Are you actually an ‘influencer’ or ‘just influenced’?

This is a popular term at the moment, for literally thousands of people all across the globe who apparently have nothing else to do than continually post about their lives on social media. Yes, yes, I post too, and actually this week I did three posts in one day for the first time ever. And that was just to share some magnificent photos of the an amazing sunset. The incredible colors in the sky on that particular moment.

So, what is the definition of an influencer?  Quite simple really: a person or a thing that influences another. A person with the ability to influence potential buyers of a product or service by promoting or recommending the items on social media (thank you Oxford English Dictionary!). Well in that case there are millions of them. From well-known influential people like royalty, film stars, rich and famous people, TV personalities, singers, song writers and so the list goes on.

But an influencer today is someone with a social media account, either Instagram, TikTok, Twitter, Facebook etc., who spends their days continually giving everyone the impression that they lead the most exciting life ever. Really? Often, they are supported by products, like supplements for example and often offer a special discount if you follow them and use their code. And this is where I started reading this discussion between two followers on such an account. One was very disgruntled because the account holder never reacted to any of their comments. Well, no, they never will because that is not the point. The other however, sung praises for the person concerned saying what a great influencer they were and to stop carping on and basically get offline. Is that what social media has come to then, a ‘slagging match’ when you don’t agree with what others say or think. This is definitely true for Twitter and the best example ever is of course Donald Trump, famous for all the ‘nonsense’ he posts out.

Of course, every single person wants perfection. We all do. Whether you agree with me or not, you and me and in fact everyone, is influenced by this. It can be from simple things like the ‘best decorated Christmas Tree’ to the ‘most attractive table setting’ to a ‘perfect complexion’ to the ‘latest fashion’. So, if the trend is going a certain way, we as humans often have the tendency to just want to follow the herd. By doing that we are being interesting, and by following the latest trends set an example to others. Or do we?

One thing as I write which springs to mind is all the fuss over here recently about a young social influencer who said some quite prolific things about the ‘do’s and don’ts for Corona rules’. This is a young woman followed by more than a million people. She appeared on television and was literally lost for words when asked to explain. Of course, she couldn’t say why she had suggested such stupid things. And all that just to be a social influencer! It ended up with her having to make a public apology and thus subject herself to the comments of others, some of which were quite vicious.

This is exactly what I mean when I think of the words ‘think before you speak’ or post in this case. Surely even the simplest of people realize that when you are being followed by many people on social media, they then think it’s smart, or right to agree with you and follow what you say. Remember what I said about sheep and following the herd. You have to ask yourself simply if you agree or not and if not, do not follow or waste your time making a comment.

Now social media influencers seem to have more than 24 hours in a day and post a huge amount about their daily lives, from food to fashion, about sessions in the gym, how big their muscular body looks (and thus posting photos which are fodder for the scammers) and so it goes on.

Ask yourself why? Why do you do this? Do you seriously think that people have nothing else to do than follow others? Isn’t it much more important to put your own ‘stamp’ on things? You can agree with the good ones for sure, but not just follow the rubbish just for the sake of keeping up. Or do you? It’s something to think about isn’t it?

This week I just happened to read one of the best posts I have seen in a long time from Michelle Obama, talking about the moment when she and Barack left the White House and had to welcome the Trumps in. For those of you who read it too, it was a good piece and inspiring for others. Posts like this are worth reading. Also posts about things that interest you personally too. But all the rest of the garbage? Come on, get on with something more productive. (You can find this speech on her Instagram account).

Be more selective, I try to do that every day and at the end of this year I will clear all the posts from my own Instagram account and begin again, with a fresh clean slate for 2021. The past is behind me now and I don’t need a record number of either posts, followers or to be an influencer either. Just to share things, that is fine but in moderation. I don’t need to be sharing my entire life with people I don’t even know. And I am strict on that score too, if I see that anyone is following me who I don’t know personally they get blocked and deleted.

It is the only way and social media people who keep complaining about the number of fake accounts they have, in other words, people who have made accounts using their countless number of stories, photos and posts, then the simple solution is to stop posting so much. Especially when it concerns private things, like photos made in your own home. It’s just my advice, not that I expect them to either stop or do it differently, the only thing I can hope to achieve is that for all of you who read my words. Think again! Of course, it’s ok to share one or two things, but keep it general. As long as the world is full of fakes and scammers, is it worth it? Is it a good idea to post literally everything because you are just feeding them with information and the opportunity to then abuse others using your information too!

Which brings me back to the discussion I started talking about at the beginning. The disappointment from the one person that the so-called influencer never reacted to her comments and the one defending the account holder. As much as I am tempted to mention the names, so you can look and see for yourself, I won’t because then I am just following the herd and that is the thing that I do not want to do.

Basically, I think it is a sad fact of life that social media influencers don’t have anything better to do. In this day and age? Surely, they must have. But the point is that it is a huge ego boost for them, the followers, the comments, the numbers and then of course once the ego takes control, then you know you are definitely not following your true dream and goals. Isn’t being just that bit different the most important thing and then also doing meaningful things. Things that are good for your own growth on a physical, emotional, spiritual and mental level. Or do you prefer to waste your time comparing yourself to people who have definitely gone off the path? Be honest with yourself, it is really a load of rubbish, which will not help you in any way. Wanting to either copy or be like them really is irrelevant. Be yourself. You are a unique being and have something so much better to contribute.

Be an influencer with an important message. Be the one to inspire others. Be the one who is empathic and cares. Be the one who is not afraid to be authentic. Be the one who speaks his or her truth. And be the one who dares to follow their own dreams and goals.

Now that is influencing!

IMAGES: GOOGLE

ASTROLOGICAL HAPPENINGS

Every day when I open my email ‘inbox’ I find a huge amount of ‘astrological emails’ and I mean a lot. And each and every one of them is offering me advice! I never get the opportunity to read them all, as it would probably take me the entire day at least, but some have important messages. So how can you separate the wheat from the chaff? You sort of know instinctively that there is an important message for you somewhere in there! So, what is the meaning? I have written on this subject before, but thought it was time to perhaps do something again … so here goes.

A lot of people may or may not realize that the so-called Natal Chart that every single one of us has, is in fact a very important photo image of the exact moment of birth. If you know all your details, you can search on the internet and go to a site called: www.astro.cafeastrology.com and fill it in.  One important thing to try and add, is the exact time of your birth. Then you will receive a long report about all the aspects of your own personal natal chart. But how to you decipher it all? It’s going to be along very detailed report, which may confuse you totally.

I have been fascinated by stars and planets since I was a child. Like probably everyone does, I read my ‘horoscope’ in most newspapers and magazines on a regular basis. Also, the annual predictions for the year ahead. But normally these are just general comments for a particular zodiac sign, the important information is in your natal chart.

The rising sign in your natal chart (in other words your zodiac sign) is the moment when the sun was rising at the time of your birth. Your sun sign is the birth moment. There are 12 signs in the zodiac wheel, beginning with Aries and ending with Pisces.

But then it is important to see where all the planets were at the time of your birth and in which of the 12 houses of the wheel too. 

To make it easier maybe I should use mine as an example:

I was born in Hampton Court, near to London, England on 20th August at 03.45 am.

My rising sign is Leo, and the sun is the ruling sign of Leo too.

My ascending time (which relates to the exact time of birth) is Leo too

My lunar sign (in which position the moon was at that time) is in Taurus.

But let’s have a look at the meanings of each sign and whether they are fixed, mutable or cardinal signs and what is the ruling element:

Fire Signs:

Aries, Leo and Sagittarius

Earth Signs:

Taurus, Virgo and Capricorn

Air Signs: 

Gemini, Libra and Aquarius

Water Signs:

Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces.

Four of each:

Fixed signs: Taurus (earth), Leo (fire), Scorpio (water) and Aquarius (air). 

Mutable signs: Gemini (air) Virgo (earth), Sagittarius (fire) and Pisces (water).

Cardinal signs are Aries (fire), Cancer (water) , Libra (air) and Capricorn (earth)

Fire Signs: tend to be emotional, passionate, dynamic and often temperamental. Often get angry quickly, but they forgive easily. Adventurers with enormous energy. Physically strong and inspire others. Intelligent, self-aware, creative, idealistic and always ready for action.

Earth Signs: are grounded and people that literally bring ‘others back down to earth’. Conservative, realistic but also very emotional. Connected to material reality and goods. Practical, loyal and steady and stick by people, even in hard times.

Air Signs: rational, social and love communication and relationships with people. Thinkers, friendly, intellectual, communicative and analytical. Love philosophical discussions, social gatherings and good books.

Water Signs: exceptionally emotional and ultra-sensitive. Highly intuitive and can be mysterious. Love profound conversations and intimacy. They rarely do anything openly and always support their loved ones.

The Houses in the Zodiac Wheel:

1st: This literally is all about the ‘firsts’. First impressions, the self, appearance, leadership, new initiatives, fresh beginnings. The sign on the cusp (or starting edge) of this house is referred to as your rising sign or Ascendant. Aries

2nd: Covers everything to do with matters related to your material and physical environment. Taste, smell, sound, touch, sight. Also rules money and Self Esteem. Taurus

3rd: Rules all forms of communication – talking, thinking, gadgets and devices (cell phones, pagers, messengers). Also related to siblings, neighborhoods, travel, libraries, schoolteachers and community affairs. Gemini

4th: Sitting at the ‘bottom of the zodiac wheel’ therefore the ruler or foundation of everything. Including your homes, privacy, basic security, parents, children, parenting abilities and nurturing. Cancer

5th: Governs self-expression, drama, creativity, color, attention, romance, fun and play. Leo

6th : Domain of health and service. Schedules, organization, routines, fitness, diet and exercise, natural and healthy living. Helpfulness and being of service to others. Virgo

7th : Relationships and other people. Governs partnerships, both business and personal and any matters related to relationships in general, like contracts, marriage, business deals. Libra

8th : Mysterious. Ruling birth, death, sex, transformation, mysteries, merged energies, bonding at deep levels. Other people’s property and money (real estate, inheritance, investment). Scorpio

9th :  Higher mind expansion, international and long-distance travel, foreign languages, inspiration, optimism, publishing, broadcasting, universities and higher education. Luck, risk adventure, gambling, region, philosophy, morals and ethics. Sagittarius

10th : At the top of the chart and most public part of the chart. Governing structures, corporations, tradition, public image, fame, honors, achievements, awards, boundaries, rules, discipline, authority, fathers. The cusp or edge is also referred to as the Midheaven. Career. Capricorn

11th : Teams, friendships, groups, society, technology, video and electronic media, networking, social justice, rebellion and humanitarian causes. Originality, eccentric, sudden events, surprises, inventions, astronomy, science fiction and anything futuristic. Aquarius

12th : Endings. Final stages of a project, tying up the loose ends, completions, afterlife, old age and surrender. Separation from society, institutions, hospitals, jails, hidden agendas and secret enemies. Ruling the imagination, creativity, arts, film, dance, poetry, journals and the subconscious mind. Pisces

Confused? Either go back or read on :-

So, on the natal chart, your picture photo moment of arrival, the planets are positioned in houses. Some have one or two, others may be empty. But according to the planet and its meaning it has a ‘highlight’ effect on your personality and life path… 

The Planets: There are of course 12! Listed in proximity to the Sun: Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Ceres, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, Pluto, Chiron and not forgetting the Moon.

Just so that you aren’t confused, the sun is not strictly a planet, it is a star undergoing evolution. Other planets circulate the sun in the solar system.

However, the so-called inner planets: Sun, Moon, Mercury, Mars and Venus – they all move quickly through the zodiac wheel. Affecting your day-to-day moods, and habits.

The outer planets: Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune, Uranus and Pluto. Move slowly changing signs everyone to fifteen years. As a result, they shape the bigger trends in your life. Neptune, Uranus and Pluto orbit so slowly that they are said to shape entire generations.

So, what are the key words for each one:

Sun                  your basic personality                      every month

Moon              moods and emotions                         every 2-3 days

Mercury         mind and communication               every 3 – 4 weeks

Venue             love and attraction                            every 4-5 weeks

Mars               drive and energy                                every 6-7 weeks

Jupiter            luck, growth and wisdom                every 12-13 months

Saturn            discipline, fears and challenges      every 2-3 years

Uranus           change and originality                      every 7 years

Neptune         dreams and healing                           every 10-12 years

Pluto               power and transformation               every 12-15 years

So, here is the meaning about what happens when two or more planets are within 0 degrees to each other in the zodiac wheel. It is then called:  a conjunction. If they are 60-degrees apart then it’s a sextile, two planets that are 180 degrees apart are an opposite. There are of course 360 degrees in the wheel.

Astrology is literally ‘tracking’ the movement of the relationships of the planets and other celestial bodies. Words like trine, square, aspects, conjunctions, and opposition are common terms in astrology. But what do they mean?

Basically, it describes the angles the planets form to one another across the wheel. As planets move across the sky, each angle means something different.  Whilst each planet has a meaning (see above), the way that they can affect us is, in which sign they are located at any given time. As well as the relationships they form with others.

Of the five major aspects some are considered hard and others soft. Easy aspects are sextile and trine. A conjunction is generally aligned into another category or a strong potential for it to go either way, depending on the direction of the planet itself. A planet going retrograde (and this happens a lot) means it is going backward. Some trines can be helpful, others not.

But the aspects are essential to predict or interpret astrology. They can totally change or influence the meaning of a planetary placement. We have also to look at how they blend with other planetary energies. Two compatible planets are cozy, or they can challenge each other and be harsh in a square. As an example, Venus is the planet or love and generally associated with positive qualities, but if it is a ‘difficult’ aspect with another planet like Saturn for example it can cause a lot of upset in our love lives.

There are so many factors to consider it is really too much for this blog and it was never written to aspire to a ‘quick course’ in astrology. 

Summarizing: 

A conjunction is when two planets link up together in the same sign. They share their energy. If they get along, it’s a high potential, if not, then a heavier more challenging aspect occurs.

Sextile is fun, full of good vibrations and positive. A friendly ‘flirty’ aspect between signs, 60 degrees apart. Often between fire and air signs, or earth and water signs. Sunshine, happy situations, and a nice break from stress. But a downside is not a major energy aspect for don’t expect a major shift. 

It’s all about ease and compatibility. Not too much drama.

A trine (120-degree angle) is generally considered the best and most auspicious aspect, bringing luck, harmony and major synchronicity. An understanding of the elements. A trine happens when planets are in the same elements (fire, earth, air or water). When this happens, they understand each other’s motives making the energy much easier to work with than against. Positive aspects with positive outcomes.

Square: a bit of a cosmic drama. Just like the shape of the square itself. An intense aspect that often dictates action. They show that work is needed to produce a favored outcome. 

Opposition: When planets are directly opposite one another (180 degrees). Often in this case planets are literally ‘butting heads’. Even though they are as far apart as they can be in the wheel itself, it is difficult to find harmony. Wants or needs may seem polar. But you probably remember the famous saying: ‘opposites attract’? It is sort of seeking a balance between the energy of the planets opposite and trying to work together. In simple terms then making an opposition run smoothly. Synergy, two opposites complimenting each other.

Astrology is an immense subject and people study it for years. This is just a simple sampler for the basic terms and meanings. But as everything is moving, its continually changing. Each and every day. The only stable moment is your birth moment, which is a photo shot of that exact moment in the celestial heavens. It forms your basic character and you know your strengths and weaknesses.

I could write on and on, but it was not really my intention. I started all this by talking about my email inbox and now you probably know why it’s almost impossible to read everything.

This is my natal chart and you can get yours too, with the link I gave in the beginning. Its free and will give you a good insight into who you are and why you are hear. And more importantly: what you came here to do!

MY PERSONAL NATAL CHART

I hope this gives you a better insight into interpretating your daily horoscope or even the realization of why you behave or present yourself in a certain way. I highly recommend an astrologist, who I do actually read in all my pile and that is Astro Butterfly.  You can google her easily and subscribe to her newsletters and insights. This is the one that resonates the most with me. (www.astrobutterfly.com)

Thanks to the mentioned internet sites and images Google. Natal chart image is personal.

FROM FIASCO TO HOPE

Never in my entire life have I witnessed such a fiasco in the recent US Elections. It is a very complicated and an almost incomprehendible system. How first of all the voting takes place and secondly how the said votes are counted and what it means? Who is the winner and who is the loser? The entire world had a week of tension, people were working flat out to count the votes and news reporters and television presenters going days without sleep to finally come up with the ‘Breaking News’ who would become the 46th President of the United States of America. Before I go on, 4 and 6 is 10 which goes down to 1 and the meaning of 1 is – NEW BEGINNINGS! 

As far as Donald Trump is concerned, I personally had my own thoughts right from the word go about whether or not he would be a capable President … we all did and I think I can rightly say, he shocked the world many times with his comments and Tweets. We had never seen such an active President on Twitter before. People who stood in his way were ‘fired’ and he struggled. Even though many will say, he was the first President who did not send the country to war, he did creative a lot of divide between the people. The racism was just over the top. And in the end, he was not granted a second term of office, which basically means that ‘the people’ had lost faith in him and did not want another 4 dramatic years. American economy is better than ever for sure, but he did away with things like ‘Obama Care’ depriving all the US citizens, the right to have health care, which is a big necessity in the USA. The costs for medical care are sky high and many do not get the benefit purely because they cannot afford it. What a crazy thought is that, with the world economy that the biggest world power, has citizens who cannot afford the basic cost of care of their health. The one thing money cannot buy – good health.

But between the dark confusing days, there was suddenly a glimmer of hope. If Joe Biden will be a good President, we will have to wait and see, but my eyes are on the Vice President who is really going to bring a big sweeping change into the stuffy corridors in the White House. The speeches were uplifting and suddenly you saw a divided nation find their pride again and the desire to work together.  And that is the best thing that could happen. A bright ray of hope appeared and then it’s going to be working together instead of constantly the egoistic divide. The judgement that some races or beliefs are better than others. That is complete nonsense and we all know it. Religion has been the force behind the problems across the entire planet for centuries and isn’t it about time to move forward now?

I remember as a child the assassination of President John F Kennedy. I can recall the exact moment. It was on a Friday and I had been to ‘Brownies’ and when my father came to collect me that November evening, he told me on the way home. It did not mean much to me at the time, yes, I knew the name, but that the world would be so shocked, that did not register at all in my young mind. But I know every single person reading this blog will remember that moment too.  

We never ever were told the entire truth about the reasons why were we?

Many presidents have come and gone in the meantime, all of whom have left their mark on the history of the United States. Some have been big influencers others have been a ‘real pain in the neck’. It’s a powerful job and all you fans of ‘House of Cards’ will have seen what goes on behind the scenes. It may be fictional, but I think there was a lot of truth.

American politics is tough, you have to watch your back all the time. Everyone may seem genuine, but many are only out for their own gain.  

Let’s hope that Joe Biden and Kamala Harris bring new light into an old institution. That they will find the means and the ways to unite a very divided nation once more.

We have had all the emotions this election, despair, anger, disbelief, fake news, miscounting votes and so the sad story continued, until just a simple comparison of numbers showed that there was no doubt anymore that there was a new President.

Will we now be inundated with stories on the news of Trump filing a succession of lawsuits: to my mind he would be much more dignified and respected if he conceded his defeat gracefully. Don’t you agree?

Americans could finally rest yesterday evening, knowing that a very important thing occurred, there was Hope. Hope to do it all differently. Hope to do everything better. Hope to unite instead of divide. Hope to love one another. 

That is all that is needed. And now dear Americans, the rest is up to you: to work together now and put all differences into the past. You can do it!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

31st October 2020. It’s Halloween everyone and it is going to be a bit different this year. With all the lockdowns and Corona rules and regulations across the world, then as I said – different.

The actual meaning of Hallow e’en or ‘All Hallows’ dates back to ancient times. It is the evening before All Saint’s Day (1st November). It originates from the old Keltic calendar when the year began on the 1st November, so in fact Halloween was a sort of New Year’s Eve. The harvest was gathered and the seeds for sowing next year were ready. So, after a long year, it was time for a day off. The Celtic New Year (or Samhain) was originally an Irish word for the month of November.

This day was celebrated in England, by the Celts and they believed this was the evening when all the ghosts of people who had died, came back to visit their families and tried to take over someone’s body who was still living, for the coming new year. A bit creepy and it made me think of the famous film ‘Ghost’. To attract the ghosts to rise up and visit, people put out food at their doors. But to scare away the angry ghosts, people made masks. When the Romans invaded England, they mixed the old Celtic traditions with their own. In the 9th Century when Christianism crossed the seas and mixed with many other cultures. People began to dress up and offered people special bread made with currants and raisins. With each bread, they said prayers to the ones who had passed away in each family. To not only help them on their ascension to heaven but this may also have been the origin of the now famous ‘trick or treat’.

Halloween is a major happening mainly in the USA. People buy costumes, decorate their gardens with spooky things, like skeletons, spiders with sticky webs, hollowed out pumpkins with scary faces which were originally called ‘Jack o’ Lanterns’. During the majority of the 20th Century this was essentially a feast for children. Dressing up and going from door to door for tricks or treats. The whole idea being to scare the person who opened their door. And hoping that they had an extensive tray full of sweets to choose from. By the end of the evening, the bag would hopefully be full !

Recently this has become a feast for young and old and adults love to dress up too! Have parades and Halloween parties. Scaring people was the theme and the costumes and make up got more and more adventurous.

I can remember as a child growing up in England that we would often decorate our garage and have a party there with all the local kids. Light tea-lights and spend days hollowing out the biggest pumpkin we could find and making a scary face. Hang wool to make spiders webs. It was all good innocent fun, but now things have taken on a much bigger proportion, certainly in the USA. And then of course there was Bonfire Night to follow on the 5th November with fires in the garden and fireworks. This really originated from Guy Fawkes and the fact that he tried to blow up the Houses of Parliament in London, with gunpowder.

It is sad this year that a fun feast for children is going to be so restricted by the current world situation and that we all have to take care still to stop the spreading of this virus.

But people will always be inventive and I saw on the television that people in the USA had made special long sticks to give children their treats if they came to the door. What will happen tonight I don’t know, seeing as there are now curfews and the stopping of crowds on the streets in large number.

But Happy Halloween everyone wherever you are in the world today. Keep strong and Keep Safe.

And a little extra this year: It’s a full moon! The first Full Moon on Fixed Earth since 1944 at Halloween

Images: Google

FAKES AND FANTASIES

The idea for this blog came up in my mind a couple of days ago. A very popular satirical TV-presenter, Arjen Lubach, talked about ‘fantasy nets’ and algorithms on the internet. He makes the show amusing and funny, but there is so much truth in what he is saying. The subject sort of stayed in my mind. I will tell you why.

Have you ever noticed if you look something up on internet that your social media, Instagram and Facebook suddenly starts to show advertisements on exactly the things you were looking up? It doesn’t matter really what the subject is, from Christmas baubles to gardens sheds, but each and every advertisement you then see, draws your attention to that. This is because of the algorithms that Facebook (the owner of Instagram too) then bombard you with these advertisements. On that score let’s look at another angle.

How many people do you know in your own circles with an Instagram account? Virtually everyone I suspect. I will take my own account as an example: I started mine, not to post things daily about what I am having for breakfast, what I am wearing, if I am at the hairdressers or having my nails done, but more to ‘shout out’ things about, for instance, the blogs I am writing, or the books I publish. As my website is registered and protected then by copyright, it’s not really anything more that drawing it to peoples’ attention. I hardly ever publish a photo about me personally, my family, my home, much more photos of nature, of my dog or cat.

But there are other types of accounts which are so much different. First of all, we have the ‘blue tick verified’ accounts which usually belong to real influencers, like movie stars, television personalities, artists and such like and the very few who get awarded this verification because they have so many followers. 

And then there are those who are the so-called influencers. Usually very good-looking women or men, who have many followers, who are actually people they do not even know, but more the people who like the photos. Some of the photos are ones that I would never in my wildest dreams think of publishing, like for the men, naked to the waist posing in their boxer shorts, the women flouting their peachy bums or huge boobs. Anything to get attention and even more followers. Hoorah, they get thousands of views and hundreds of comments. The comments are usually in my opinion, not even worth reading, more hearts, flames of fire, kisses etc. etc.

And you get to know every single detail of their life from morning to night. Their car, their home, the food they eat, the drinks they have with friends, it’s an ongoing daily account about their lives. All for the fans! But what is the point I ask myself? What do you hope to gain? Do you think that you are popular because you get so many likes? From people you don’t even know. Come on wake up!

My golden rule as far as social media is concerned, is that the moment I see someone is following me, and I don’t know them personally I am not really interested, and the reason why is, that a lot of the accounts are actually fakes and used by scammers. Now those of you who read my blogs regularly know that I have written a lot about this subject. The way to tell if the accounts are fake or not is usually, they post a lot of photos which have the same date and they are following many, but few follow them. This is the moment to take care and before you add them into your circles, which gives them access to all your photos too: ask yourself this one simple question: do I know them personally or not? If not, then just block. Every single day I see accounts on Instagram that are using the photos of people who are more well known, where photos have been stolen and they have created a fake identity, usually the same name, but the placing of the letters just slightly different order because they know people will just be taken in by it. After all the so-called influencers which I mentioned above, probably accept literally everyone who follows them because that is why they have an account in the first place.

FAKE is a trending word right now. We have fake news, fake profiles, fake information and fantasy nets which all lure us into one thing: ‘fear’. And we all know that when people are fearful, it creates power for those who are doing it.

What is the point really pretending to be a fake? What do you hope to gain from it? Aren’t you worth so much more when you are your real authentic self? Don’t you prefer to have friends who appreciate you for who you really are. Would you really be happier in circles with genuine people or in ever increasing circles with fakes? It is something to think about isn’t it?

I have some more words on this subject but before I go any further, let’s look at the real definition: (and this in a big one!)

FAKE (an adjective)

Not genuine. An imitation. A counterfeit. Claiming to be something that you are not. A forgery. A sham. A person who falsely claims something. To pretend to feel or have an emotion, illness or injury. A jealous concern. Pretend to make an event happen. To trick or deceive someone 

And now some words for my friend, who just by chance brought this subject up too:

I came to realize that we have a lot of fake people in this world who pretend to be good and have good intentions, but in actual fact their intentions are really bad.

Fake is definitely a trending topic I agree at the moment and I have said so in the beginning of this blog.

You just have to be the government of yourself and follow your heart. You don’t have to do what someone said or follow the words of men. Some are literally devils in the form of angels.

Absolutely and I can think of many examples.

Fake is the topic at the moment I feel and there is so much which is fake, news, profiles, social media.

Yes, and the reason for this blog and sharing our thoughts again in a dialogue.

These people are basically evil and want to profit from others. They go literally to all lengths to bring another into discredit. Everyone always has something to say about everything when it concerns another person. Jealousy is a big issue and often the cause.

It’s not about who is real to your face. It is about who stays real behind your back

Very true and probably you can count these people literally on one hand.

I don’t hate my hater’s, but I will never ever surround myself with negativity. I am better than that.

True friends will not. It is always best, in my opinion to rise up above their negativity. Show you are better and even that you do not ‘care’.

It is better you speak your truth even if you voice shakes.

And no matter how scared you are of being rejected, which everyone is.

Every problem has in it the seeds of its own solution. If you don’t have any problems, you do not get any seeds

Exactly, you can only reap what you sow.

The truth requires less stress and energy than trying to cover up one’s lies. Some people are real, some people are good. Some people are fake and some people are good at being fake. The point is who do you want to be? Not what people want to see.

I always think that lies are comparable to a spiders’ web you get so caught up in the lies that it is very hard to find your way out to the truth.

No one in this world is pure or perfect. If you avoid people for their little mistakes, you will always be alone. So, judge less and love more!

Love is what the entire world needs so desperately. We all need it. We all crave it!

When you are honest from the beginning you don’t have to lie to cover up the lie you already told. Honesty is always the best policy. Don’t be afraid to show the real YOU. If people don’t like it, sorry honey it’s your loss.

Absolutely. It is so much more important to be the real you than to pose as a fake merely for popularity. It is not good for your conscience. Can you literally go to bed at night and sleep peacefully, if you have been putting yourself forward as a fake?

I would rather go on in life being me and imperfect than striving to be what someone else wants.

That to me is an important statement. We may make mistakes, no one has ever said we have to be perfect. Is there really someone out there who is? I would rather have friends and contacts who are authentic than fakes just for popularity. You?

Our true self is being who we are. Beauty is being the best possible version of yourself on the inside and on the outside

And it is perfectly OK to be vulnerable and show your true colors.

Hurt me with the truth. But never comfort me with a lie.

Exactly.

I would rather be alone than surround myself with a fake environment. 

From the words about the true meaning of fake it is virtually about deception. Trying to be something which you are not. What is the point? Does it make you a better person?

True friends say good things behind your back and bad things to your face.

Well they do and the reason is that they love you. You are important to them and they do this when they have your best interests at heart too. That is a true friend.

Speak the truth even if your voice trembles, don’t let anyone judge you by your mistakes .. they just don’t know what it takes.

No, they don’t. They do not understand that we are moving away from ‘duality and competition’. Working towards the bigger, better picture. And doing that together.

Always speak how you really feel and never be sorry for being real. I would rather be despised for my character than liked for my lack of it.

I think listening to your own inner voice is important. You know who you are. You know what your values are. If others cannot see that, it’s their problem.

I am too lazy to be fake. Being real takes a lot less effort. I don’t have to do anything apart from be myself.

It is definitely more worthwhile to be a genuine person than a fake. Being fake is just stealing or taking on a dishonest identity. Fakes are lazy, and by that I mean, they steal other’s images, other people’s identity. Always thinking they are better.

Sometimes the things we say sarcastically, are what we are really thinking deep down. Always be yourself despite what other’s think. If you are not selling the real you to people you are selling yourself short.

Personally, I have no admiration for sarcasm. It is trying to be too clever to hide your own shortcomings. It hurts other people, there is no love really in sarcasm. And the big question: why would you choose to knowingly undersell yourself? That baffles me totally.

(Thank you to my friend for his inspiration during this dialogue, we did that live yesterday).

So, I hope reading through, you have more or less come to the conclusion that being a fake or using something fake is really not right and actually quite pathetic. Why would you do this? Wouldn’t you want to be seen as someone genuine and true. Someone who speaks their truth, listens to your truth and has a genuine interest for you personally. Or do you want to go through life as a ‘poser’ with all your followers and fans, who are virtually people you don’t even know. Tell me what the value is in that then? Absolutely none. Does it make you better than the rest? No it doesn’t because it is not real.

You will be much more appreciated and loved if you portray yourself for the person you really are. The true authentic you is worth so much more than a fake!

The clocks go back this weekend as we step into wintertime, in the Northern Hemisphere and into the summer in the southern. Why not take that extra time to look at your own social media accounts, tidy them up and maybe be more critical about what you post from now on and who you follow and who follows you?

I can guarantee you will be surprised, if not horrified.

Happy Weekend everyone.

Special thanks again to my friend for his contribution, which is always hugely appreciated.

Images: Google

NEVER GIVE UP!

Yesterday a very nice dialogue happened between me and my very talented ‘writer friend’ so we decided to try something different in this blog, to put down our discussion into words: And the theme is ‘Never Give Up’. Good advice and often hard for many people to follow because often failures make you want to do exactly that. So, how do you find the motivation to keep going, no matter what comes across your path. We are all walking a path, but all our paths are different. They lead in many directions. People have different dreams, desires and use their own special talents along the way. That is perfect and everything is always going according to plan for each and every one of us:

So, hope you will like this new format and new idea. His words are in italics as usual.

I think you will agree, a man who gives amazing inspiration to all of us. It gives me great pleasure to share my website platform with him. Thank you, my friend for your contribution, everyone is enjoying ‘our blogs’ together!

To continue on from the previous blog published on Sunday 18th October 2020 …. (entitled What does it mean to set goals, Realize your Ambitions, Manifest your Dreams?)

 Just because something seems hard to obtain doesn’t mean you should give up. Instead you should make more effort and work hard to achieve it.

I agree entirely but often people don’t want to make the effort. It’s because some things have become too easy. To me hard work sounds something more understandable from generations back, when hard work meant hard labor. Literally.

 Don’t’ reduce your efforts just because you missed the target, nothing great comes simple Steady your aim and train harder.

There is nothing wrong with missing the target, succeeding first time is often just ‘beginners’ luck’, but it is those who are strong, physically, mentally and emotionally who will do as you say.

 Some people will always prefer to see you down and lower but use that to motivate yourself to working harder and growing better.

Unfortunately, it’s a fact of life and this is mostly to do with jealously that people will gloat when you fail and are unsuccessful. It sort of brings you down to their own level of failure. But it is definitely then the motivation to try again and persevere.

 If you feel like giving up, remember that you will accomplish nothing by doing so. Keep it moving and never give up.

This is so important I feel, because giving up is just an easy escape. You don’t feel good about yourself for actually giving up and the idea to keep moving whatever happens, is absolutely right.

 I have failed countless times and still kept going. It’s because I have learned that the more times I fall, the more I will learn.

Don’t you think that everyone will agree with you on this? We have all failed and from those mistakes made we have learned the most. Failing is just a single physical action but being brave to get up once more and try again, that is strength.

 Keep the faith. Keep working hard and great things will happen.

Agree, always having faith in your own dreams is very important. If you don’t have that, no one else will see your greatness. It is up to all of us to be true to ourselves and not just be sheep following the herd. And to keep your own mind about your goals without being influenced by others.

 Great victory can follow a shocking defeat if there is positive persistence in the    pursuance. Never say never. Keep the hope alive.

It is a very important thing in life to have hope. Never lose hope. It is the key to finding success. And that word ‘never’ is really a figment of imagination. Everything is possible if you set your mind right.

 If you fall, rise up and shake off the dust and try again.

I always find that if I fall and that often happens, literally physically, it is the universe telling me that something is not quite right, or I am being stopped to reflect.  Stopped in my tracks for a reason and it’s important to trust that the reason in the end is, for your better good.

 Never give up and never stop trying to achieve the goals and the dreams that you  know you deserve.

Giving up is the easy way out. Stopping to try to then follow your goals, also wrong. You know what you want and what you deserve for the effort you will take. It is your dream or dreams and you should be true to yourself and go for it one hundred percent. No one else will do it for you.

 If you are doing good work, don’t stop. Press on and keep working, no matter what others say or how much they discourage you.

It is very easy to be discouraged in these strange times as we all basically have a fear for rejection. People will always have something to say about everything other people do. It’s just human nature. It is up to you whether you take notice of it, or, make the choice to stay centered and true to yourself.

In life, you never know what kind of result you will get until you try your best and see to it until the end.

Absolutely and often the whole process is comparable to a journey. That is the best part, the destination is important too, but the learning comes during the journey. Trying your best is always the option you should choose, because no one ever got anywhere doing nothing.

No matter how hard I try, life just won’t let me get want without trying. But I won’t give up.

I think this is a very big part of your character and the reason why a lot of people look up to you, as you have proved so many times that you don’t give up. It’s a very admirable quality

 No matter how many times you fail, you are not a failure until you quit trying.

Just quitting is like running away. Away from the truth. Failing is not bad, failing is in fact good. It’s frustrating at the time, but true will power pushes you to go on. Its what people have been doing for centuries, try, try and try again. A worthy motto, but it takes guts to do that.

Winners lose much more often than losers. So, if you keep losing but you are still            trying so just keep it up! You are right on track.

It is very easy to become discouraged when you lose, but often a good idea to summarize what you have actually lost. Is it that important when you look back? You cannot change it, or the past, just merely look at the imprint you left behind, learn by it and move on in a forward’s direction. The path is clear, but there can be not only obstacles, but many saboteurs who try their utmost to distract you and lead you off course.

Limits are just a state of mind, you can always push yourself to do better, no matter what the cost might be. Keep going at it and you will succeed.

Yes, limits are something you set upon yourself. The removal of same, pushes you on in fact to do better, isn’t then the cost irrelevant? The fact that you try is so much more important. And if you keep going, you definitely succeed. Good advice.

You have a choice. You can throw in the towel or you can use it to wipe the sweat off your face.

Oh, how easy is it in fact to just chuck in the towel and many do that. You do have a choice, always and stick to it or them.

Never quit. If you stumble get back up. What happened yesterday no longer matters. Today is another day so get back on course and move closer to your dreams and  goals. You can do it!

I think it is hard for a lot of people to realize that what happened yesterday is the past. You cannot change it; you cannot literally walk back into yesterday and do it better. We live very much in the here and now, what tomorrow will bring we don’t know. So even when things go wrong, make a choice and do it differently. Dreams and goals are the most important things in life. You have to have them, if you don’t you just wander around in every increasing circles. Of course, you can do it if you have the right mind-set. Very important! After all it is your dream and your goal.

It’s not important to achieve everything at first or in one go. But it is extremely vital to make positive progress in reasonable time.

I think this is very true. People get easily disheartened when it does not al come together immediately. You can sort of compare it to a large puzzle. All the pieces are on the table. You pick up the first one and perhaps make the corners first. As you progress the picture becomes clearer until you create your own masterpiece.

Innovation is repeated failure until something works.

Absolutely and it will always be that way.

Don’t work until you get it right. Work until you get it wrong.

I think maybe some people will have difficulty relating to this, because their brain is telling them to get it right. The whole point here is that the continued work, even if you get it wrong, is the learning process.

Life is like a sport, facing obstacles and learning from them. Every time we fall, we get  back up and try again until we finish what has been started! We try and try never to quit, because what is life without trying?

Again, I agree, because life becomes more worthwhile because you try and are eventually rewarded for your efforts. In other words, you realize your own dream or goal.

Life may challenge you from the worst case ever. But don’t be afraid of fighting what’s for you and what’s for the better.

Life has always been and always will be a challenge. That is if you want to make something of your life, and motivated people do, then often you need to fight. Fight for the right things. The whole point is that you remain true to yourself. Dare to be different. Dare to do things others may scorn or think you are stupid for trying. Who says so?  It is usually a mirror of their own shortcomings or lack of willpower. Just because one fails, not everyone has to.

Sometimes I act like I have given up, but inside me, I am just warming up!

The people who know you personally will definitely agree with this. There is so much power in you it is almost (un)believable. You have such a strong willpower, it’s admirable. So just keep warming up, it’s a good example for many. Acting as you well know is merely playing a role on  the stage of a production, called: Life.

Never let any hurdles big or small in life, trip you up and stop you from achieving your goals in life.

When I think of hurdles I think back to my schooldays, running up and down gravel tracks and jumping across obstacles. Some fell, some remained standing. Was there any point in going back and picking up the ones that had fallen? Not really, the race was actually over anyway. But you can think about why they fell. Did you not jump high enough, were you actually satisfied and did not try harder? Looking back is fine, but don’t allow it to influence your future too much.

Keep trying your chances, you never know which will yield the best result.

I really love the word ‘change’ because it is so similar to the word ‘chance’. One letter in actual fact. Chances are gifts offered along your way, it’s your choice that makes the best or the worst result. Just make sure your choice is the right one, for you. It is all about you. Take a chance.

Too many people use being scared as an excuse for not trying. You may fail, try   anyway. That is how you grow. That is how you do incredible things.

Exactly and there are many examples of people who did do incredible things because they kept on trying. Like inventions and this is not about current days things, but inventions like the wheel for example. A person invented it and the reward was great for all of us. We cannot think of life now without a wheel. Actually, the symbolism of the wheel is like a circle, that keeps going around and around, as effort is made.

Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.

Yes, similar to what I said to your last comment. A great example of this and something that is very hard to even comprehend to this day is how ancient civilizations in Egypt actually managed without cranes or other mechanical devices to build the pyramids. A thing we have been asking ourselves for thousands of years and then to get them exactly in alignment with the star constellation of Orion. Maybe because they were less distracted by unimportant issues and lived their lives intuitively.

In the business world everyone is paid in two coins: Cash and experience. Take the  experience first, the cash will come later.

I have always thought and said to you several times that money is just energy. It is a way of exchange. Exchanging something for something else from another. It does not make you a better man for sure (and I am generalizing here, so don’t take is personally), how many millions you have on your bank account. Experience is worth so much more than cash. We all need cash to survive for sure, but how much do we really need to realize our dreams. People seemed to have lost all perspective on this score. It is no longer important how big your house is, how flash your car is, how good your job is, how many holidays you go on every year. That is just the outer impression, it’s what is on the inside that counts.

For me the most fun is change or growth. There are definitely elements of both that I Iike. Launching a business is kind of like a motorboat, you can go very quickly and turn fast.

Ah, men and the need for speed! Motivation to move. Motivation to do something that turns into a project and eventually a business. It was the pleasure doing it rather than the completion of the job.

Nothing works better than just improving your product.

Of course, always room for improvement in all walks of life.

 If you have knowledge let others light their candles in it.

I like this comment very much. One of the quotes I often think about is comparing ourselves to a lighthouse. We don’t have to go running around islands looking for boats; it is our job to stand still and provide the light for others. It is a slightly different way than you said it but comes down to the same. If I have knowledge isn’t it so much more rewarding to share. That is a problem in the world right now, people want to create their own little islands of importance. They have not yet realized that working together, often with completely opposites, brings something even better. But there are always ‘givers’ and ‘receivers’. It is the best if you can create a happy medium. Give and Receive. That is balance. The one who always gives will soon be left with nothing. The same applies to those who only receive, they become greedy, but do they actually need it?

Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it.

I am sure many great leaders will agree with you totally on this one!

As you start your journey the first thing you should do is throw away the store-bought  map and begin to draw your own.

I love this comment because as I mentioned earlier there are many paths, which maybe lead in the same direction, but each and every one in life is personal. My path is my path. Your path is your path. They may cross and run parallel for a long time, which is good and rewarding, but in the end, it is absolutely about drawing your own map. Always!

I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress and grow brave by reflection. It’s the business of little minds to shrink, but those whose heart is firm and who’s conscious approves their conduct, will pursue their principles until  death.

Very true. But it takes a broad-minded person to be able to actually smile. Many don’t they are afraid of what other will say about their so-called failure or distress, thinking that they are the lessor ones. I agree that listening to your own heart is the purest voice you will hear. If your conscious says ‘yes’ deep within (that gut feeling) you know you are doing the right things, making the right choices. Personally, I don’t see death in the way many others see it, and this is a long subject. I always believe and always have, that we merely leave our physical body behind and that our soul lives on endlessly. It is not an easy thing to believe, because people are afraid to die. But to me it is just the completion of a circle which we call life. One circle ends and another begins. Like in the seasons in nature. Like a new year following on another. It has always been this way. The Circle of Life.

The last 10 % it takes to launch something takes as much energy as the first 90%.

Yes, agree but many people are so entirely focused on the end result that they fail to see all the things they learn (your words the 90%). It is the energy to get a project started. Getting your ideas and turning them into something constructively. That takes effort and also a lot of belief in yourself.

Being able to touch so many people through my businesses and make money while doing it, is a huge blessing.

Of course, inspiring others is important. The money less, I think. The blessing comes when you realize that you have achieved your dream or goal (or at least one of them). We all have more than one.

Always make a total effort even when all the odds are against you.

Yes, effort at the beginning so much more rewarding really than the end result. Even though the end result is satisfying and encourages you to go on and do more.

 The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra.

The extraordinary is your belief that miracles can actually happen when you truly set your mind and your heart to achieve something great. The extra effort on the journey teaches you so much. Ordinary is easy, it’s like sitting back and doing nothing. Extraordinary is so much more exciting.

Don’t let winning make you soft. Don’t let losing make you quit. Don’t let your    teammates down in any situation.

To me it’s giving everything you have got and much more too. The ‘winning’ moment is literally a moment and so easy to then sit back and be complacent. And I so agree about working in teams. Working in synergy with one another. Another friend of mine always talks about the great WE compared to the great I. Which one do you choose?

There is no substitute for hard work, 23 or 24 hours a day. And there is no substitute for patience and acceptance.

Not working hard is complacency. Letting others make the effort. Do you think the satisfaction is then great? No, it isn’t because it is not your effort. Patience is not an easy virtue as everyone is in such a hurry these days. By accepting that great things often take longer because you need to learn more is a much greater substitute. 

The secret of getting ahead is getting started. The secret of getting started is breaking   your complex, overwhelming tasks into smaller manageable tasks and then starting on the first one.

Very similar I think to making your own map. I know this well, being a writer. When an idea about a book first comes into your mind (the inspiration) it is good to make a sort of backbone of a plan about what it will be about. In other words, set the stage, make the characters, give them all their identity and the weave the story. You cannot write a new chapter until you have read and finished the previous one. A full page has to become a blank one then so that inspiration flows. Sometimes it stops, a writer’s block occurs and I find that this is the time to actually take a short pause, get out into the fresh air. Allow your mind to clear. Often greatest inspiration comes when you least expect it. Never try to put pressure on yourself if you believe that you are only successful whilst you perform. You need to rest too. But I agree, one step at a time, takes you up the ladder. To the finished result.

You must not only aim right but draw the bow with all your might!

Absolutely Robin Hood! Look, aim, draw back the bow and hit the target and if you miss, try again.

I know the price of success: dedication, hard work and unremitting devotion to the things you want to see happen.

A very admirable quality for sure.  Because all the things you say especially the word ‘devotion’ allows you to have clarity (or clear vision about where you want to go)

It is not that things are difficult that we do not dare it is because we do not dare that they are difficult.

Again, this is where I think we have a fear or being rejected by others if we do something a little bit different. It takes courage to stand out. But it’s always the right choice. It’s not important what another thinks when it is about your own personal dream or goal. It is your’s not their’s. To dare takes courage. Be yourself and take the steps you have to get the thing you want. Against all odds, they are merely saboteurs along the way.

There is nothing wrong with staying small. You can do big things with a small team

True dare to jump into the deep even though you don’t know exactly where you will land. It the fact that you dare to jump that counts the most. Just like the journey, more important than the destination. Not easy though, you have to have faith.

Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not.; nothing is  more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not: the world is full of    educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The phrase     ‘press on’ has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.

Absolutely and I think everyone who reads our words will agree, we are living in completely crazy times and it is then even more important to stay close to your own beliefs. Do not fall into the trap of being taken in by ‘fake news or information’. That is the result of our ever-increasing desire to not miss out on anything. Persistence and determination that is what counts I agree. Press on. Together we can solve anything if you set your mind to it. As a group more than an individual. ‘Many hands make light work’ as they say. Then everyone benefits from the glory of the achievement.

I think this discussion will continue, it’s part of a friendship that has flourished a lot.

One final thought is: great minds think alike. That is so true and what is more rewarding that working as one, in a group for everyone. Then and only then will there be harmony in the world once more.

And our world is merely a tiny little speck in a vast universe.

If you have any questions, please leave a comment in the box.

A special thank you to you, my friend for your continued support and the challenge you then give me to write with you. I so appreciate it.

Images: Google

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO SET GOALS, REALIZE YOUR AMBITIONS, MANIFEST YOUR DREAMS?

We cannot deny it, we are living the in the fast lane, when a lot is expected of us, but at the same time, there are so many rules and regulations across the world at this present time, it’s often hard to ‘see the wood for the trees’. But there is never an excuse for either cancelling, postponing, or even giving up on your goals. These goals are fundamental to you. They make you the person you are. Being an ‘couch potato’ is no longer an option anymore. If you do, life will just pass you by and you will never come close to achieving your dreams. Because we all need dreams, we all need focus and something to aim for. I am handing this blog over once more to my friend, so that he can share his words: –

A person should set his goals as early as he can and devote all his energy and talent to getting there. With enough effort, he may achieve it. Or he may find something that is even more rewarding. But in the end, no matter what the outcome, he will still know that he has been alive.

Our goals can only be reached through a vehicle of a plan, in which we must vigorously act. There is no other route to success.

People with goals succeed because they know where they are going.

All who have accomplished great things have had a great aim, have fixed their gaze on a goal which was high, one which sometimes seemed impossible.

A goal without a plan is just a wish.

A goal is not always meant to be reached. It often serves simply as something to aim at.

Goals provide the energy source that powers our lives. One of the best ways we can get the most from the energy we have is to focus it. That is what goals can do for us; concentrate our energy.

You must take action now that will move you towards your goals. Develop a sense of urgency in your life.

If you don’t have goals, you will always work for someone who does.

Difficulties increase the nearer we approach the goals.

Whenever you make a mistake and get knocked down by life, don’t look back too long. Mistakes are life’s way of teaching you. Your capacity for occasional blunders is inseparable from your capacity to reach your goals. No one wins them all, and your failures, when they happen, are just part of your growth. Shake off your blunders. How will you know your limits without an occasional failure?

Crystallize your goals. Make a plan for achieving them and set yourself a deadline. Then, with supreme confidence, determination and disregard for obstacles and other people’s criticism, carry out your plan.

Reach high for the stars which lie hidden in your soul. Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal. If you want a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.

Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible.

You control your future, your destiny. What you think comes about. By recording your dreams and goals on paper, you set in motion the process of becoming the person you most want to be. Put your future in good hands, your own!

If you are bored with life – you don’t get up every morning with a burning desire to do things – you don’t have enough goals. You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream

Choosing a goal and sticking to it changes everything.

Think before you speak. Plan before you act. Accomplish your goals before it’s too late.

Not every end is the goal. The end of a melody is not its goal and yet if the melody is not reached its end, it has not reached its goal.

You may be closer to accomplishing your goals than you think. Don’t give up.

The more intensely we feel about an idea or a goal, the more assuredly the idea buried deep in our subconscious, will direct us along the path to its fulfilment.

Goals are means to an end, not the ultimate purpose of our lives. They are simply a tool to concentrate our focus and move us in a direction. The only reason we pursue goals is to cause ourselves to explant and grow. Achieving goals by themselves will never make us happy in the long term. It is who you become, as you overcome the obstacles necessary to achieve your goals, that can give you the deepest, most long-lasting sense of fulfilment.

It may take years till you succeed at a goal, but you keep trying and when you earn the victory you will appreciate its value.

Try not to change your goals and plans simply because somebody special came along. Because you’ll never know if they plan to stay forever.

We all die. The plan is not to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.

Dreaming is wonderful, goal setting is crucial, but action is supreme. To make something great happen you must get busy and make it happen!

This is so true isn’t it? I have been writing virtually all my life, but I could not have said it any better. That is why I share it with you all my readers, for that reason, it is so good and I am more than happy to give this person ‘a platform’ for their words too. After all, synergy is all about sharing. I will not be able to change the world on my own, neither will he, but working together, now that is important and therefore creating synergy. We need that to survive, we need to work together instead of alone. Isn’t this the best way? 

Synergy is an important word: so, I think I will quote from the Oxford English Dictionary what it really means:

‘The interaction or co-operation of two of more organizations or people, substances or other agents to produce a combined effect, great than the sum of their separate effects.’ 

This word finds its origin in the Greek word: ‘sunergos ‘working’ from sun and ‘ergon’ from ‘working together’.

And I so agree with the words above. I sincerely hope that I have made some effort during my own life to achieve the things I dream about. You don’t have to be good at everything. Some people use words, others use music or art, others act roles, but it is all talent. Shared talent for one another. Everyone has the right to dream no matter where you live in the world. No matter your color, race or creed. 

Remind yourself, dream your dream, set your goals, but working together, that it what really counts, because then you literally manifest them.

Shall we all do that?

Images: Google

TAKE CARE WITH YOUR WORDS …

I am going to share a bit of a personal experience in this blog, to emphasize how we should be more aware of our words when spoken and the possible effect it may or may not have on others.

We can all agree I am sure that we are living in difficult times. There is an air of despondency absolutely everywhere, caused mainly by the COVID-19 virus, which is rearing its head once again on a worldwide scale. So, as many know, fear is a very negative energy and often makes people a bit different in their daily approach to life itself. It’s like having an extra charge of uncertainty hanging in us, around us and between us all.

As my mother died of breast cancer, I have had biannual check-ups (mammograms) since her death. It’s a precautionary thing because of the slightly higher risk. I have done this for the past 20 odd years. Now all women will know only too well that having a mammogram is not the most pleasurable thing in the world. Even though I check myself regularly, it is good that we have this opportunity and screening is done regularly in certain age groups. This sort of amazes me actually, since when has a disease like cancer, taken any notice of age groups. I think personally such check-ups should be available to all women over the age of ??? who knows a good starting point?

I expect that many of us have breast cancer victims either ourselves, our family, our friends and neighbors, acquaintances, colleagues etc., and over the past years there has been more awareness about how important it is, if you think something is wrong, to go to the doctor immediately and get a check-up.

This week, having had my appointment cancelled several times due not only Corona restrictions, but also the installation of a new machine at my local hospital; finally, the moment had come. The rules and regulations are of course much stricter in the hospitals at the moment, because of this new Corona outbreak. You get a sort of ‘day ticket’ which allows you, having presented all your information at a kiosk, to be in the building for a one-hour period. 

In the waiting room, (a small niche in the corridor) I was the only person waiting and at exactly the appointment time, called into the room. Wearing a facial mask, I was actually surprised that the radiological nurse was not wearing gloves, after all she is touching my body. 

The actual x-rays take literally seconds, it’s not fun and can be quite painful, but it is literally only seconds and let’s be honest it is so worthwhile to have this done. Waiting in the corridor once more for confirmation that the films (which is all digital these days) were ok, I noticed another nurse come into the corridor and cough into her hand. For goodness sake, haven’t we all been drilled big time about hand sanitization?? And coughing, if necessary, into the inner elbow area.

I had a bit of a shock when my nurse appeared and said that one side needed to be repeated as the radiologist needed more detailed images. This is enough to be honest to almost have an ‘on the spot heart moment’. I noticed my pulse increase mainly because at this present time I have a family member with terminal lung cancer and the slight suggestion that there was something wrong … literally sent shivers down my spine.

So, the whole process was repeated, one side only and when I enquired: ‘there is nothing wrong is there?’ got a snappy answer that I would have to ask the doctor. Who, by the way, I would not be seeing during such a routine control!

My point here is that a nurse is not a doctor and as such not qualified really to make any comment. It might have, in my opinion, been better to say something like: ‘oh we need to re-do one of the photos as the image moved’. That merely implies that there may be a technical reason and definitely would not give you any idea that maybe something was wrong, or maybe they had seen something suspicious. I say this but at the same time, want to say how much respect I have for all people working in health care at the moment and I realize they are under a lot of pressure too, but all the same, it does not time to think before you speak does it?

The second set were completed and again another wait in the corridor, when she appeared for the third time to say the photos were ok and to ring my own GP in the morning. 

My mind is now in overdrive, really ring tomorrow, normally I would wait for a few days and his assistant would ring me wouldn’t she if something was wrong? The result was a disturbed night’s sleep and the next morning the feeling of trepidation about making the phone call. This may sound pathetic, but I have read in many articles that virtually everyone has this feeling. Wanting to know, but at the same time, not wanting to either.

Eventually I did of course, because I know only too well that there is no point putting it off, you have to know. And I am very glad to say, everything was perfectly ok and next checkup in 2022. Phew !!!!

My point is, that I feel it is really important to think before we speak, especially in these tenser than normal times. Choose your words with more care. My story is just a simple example. But a lot of people are very on edge at the moment and sometimes a few simple words can have such an impact. So please everyone in all walks of life: ‘think before you speak’.

I also want to say, and this is really important for every woman (or men too), who reads this blog: never wait if you think anything might be wrong or unusual, to take steps immediately to see your doctor. Putting things off or ignoring can have very huge consequences. These days, the sooner you go, the sooner action can be taken if needed and with the huge variety of therapies, things that might have ‘killed’ you a few years ago, can now be healed. Isn’t it important then never to wait? Exactly.

The old saying: ‘better to be safe than sorry’ is so relevant isn’t it?

Images: Google

SNEAK PREVIEW

Part I

PRESENT DAY

                                    CHAPTER ONE

As I gazed out of the windows, the rain dropping like shards on the glass, it matched my mood perfectly. The winter had been mild actually, no snow and one- or two-night frosts but the garden looks dead, just dark branches against the grey skies. Yes, that described me perfectly, a drab winter branch, where you begin to wonder, is it alive or dead?

I often found myself crying for really no reason, it was just the feeling of complete and utter sadness, and most of all, not having any idea why something which had seemed so perfect had just stopped. No explanations, no reasons, just died, missing without a trace!

For months I had been feeling that it was like ‘peaches with cream’. You know those satin silky ripe peaches, with that, oh so perfect skin, which reveal that golden sweetness within, in a cut glass crystal bowl with fresh, thick dairy cream … and the taste as one slips into your mouth and releases all the succulent juices. It’s heaven!

Now, as I look out of my window, through the rain, which almost feels as if its literally piercing my heart, forming cold lumps of ice within, all the branches are bare, not a leaf in sight. The gnarled twisting branches of the roses, which look almost dead to me, will soon be filled with sprouting leaves and festoons of blooms in the summer. Dead twigs with lethal thorns, beauty and pain together. Huge beautiful flowers but when picked the thorns pierce your fingers painfully. ‘Roses with thorns.’

Most of the morning has already gone, before I actually get going. I have got into the habit of getting out of bed, pottering around, having breakfast and sometimes it’s lunch time before I have even got showered and dressed. But why make such haste, it is if the life force has been sucked out of me sometimes. I don’t want to go into a depression, but I feel melancholy all the time. A song on the radio can bring back memories, a film on the television, words in a book, words in my book, all remind me of times that were so incredibly happy and filled with such optimism.

I think I actually would feel so much better if I could understand why? But I don’t and to be honest do I really want to keep asking myself the same questions over and over again? I really just want to move on, but my limbs feel stiff as if to say, you cannot move until you deal with it.

I know.

I have to.

Do I want to? Yes, I do really but it is just so hard.

Now published on Bol.com and also in Kindle e-reader version on Amazon.com

WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS NOW IS … LOVE AND FORGIVENESS

This may be a rather strange way to begin my blog, after such an impact title, about my own book (Peaches and Cream – Roses with Thorns). It was published yesterday being the 10th day of the 10th month at exactly 10.00 am, 2020. So numerically everything was exactly right.

So those of you who have read a part of it, or bought it, you will by now have realized who I have ‘teamed up’ with several times now, to write these words. 

One of the chapters in the book deals with Forgiveness. The main character, Olivia, has to process this. It is not easy and she has to go through the entire process before she can actually move on with her life. 

Yesterday also coincided with a worldwide, TED talk with more than 20 big influencers around the world, talking and contributing their thoughts about how we need to tackle the Climate Change. And by this, not only the small countries and parts of the world who do their very best, but ALL OF US.

It was a 5-hour session and of course followed by many people all over the world in different time zones. When it ended just after 10pm my local time, my main thought was that if we want to achieve this, then we first of all have to think about Forgiveness for all the wrongs that have gone before us. Many generations and civilizations ago too. 

In my humble opinion I truly believe that it is man’s greed that has caused this situation. Not to be necessarily blamed on advances in technology and such like over the centuries, but when you look back at problems in ancient times, you see that there is in fact a common theme. Greed. Everyone on their own little island, taking rather than giving, looking out for their own interests instead of the interests of the greater good.

Yes, it is true we have made huge leaps in our evolution and we needed to, but at what cost?

In my own lifetime I have seen enormous changes, thinking simply of one thing, as an example: the internet. Communication second level and so it goes on and I could devote the entire blog to this subject, but that is not really my intention.

What I want to say, is that maybe the starting point is actually forgiveness. Forgiving ourselves for the mistakes we made and generations before us. What seemed a good idea at the time, may not have been one further along the line.

I have some words on the subject of Forgiveness from my friend which I would like to share with you: –

Haters try to expose what is wrong with you, because they are jealous of everything that is right about you. There are two types of people. Those that hate their life and so something about it and those who hate their life and don’t do anything about it. Which type are you?

You cannot expect to stay on the right path, if you are walking with the wrong people.

Some people make themselves miserable and everybody else miserable when they can rather make everyone else happy. When the wrong people start to leave your life, the right things start.

Some people though come into your life and you just know you will never be able to replace them if they left. Sometimes people who act the happiest are the ones going through the most.

I admire people who choose to shine even after all the storms they have been through. Sometimes the people we fear the most should be the ones closest to us. Forget those people who forget you.

Don’t chase people. Be you. Do your own thing and work hard. The right people who belong in your life will come to you and stay.

Be with people who always show you your strength and hopes and not waste time with people who constantly remind you of your failures and mistakes.

To be around those who enhance your life is called success. To enhance the lives of those around you is called significance.

Successful people build each other. They motivate, inspire and push each other. Unsuccessful people just hate, blame and complain.

The loneliest people are the kindest. The saddest smile the brightest. The most hurt people are the wisest and the people who do not expect from others are the happiest.

People who are truly worthy would never see any good in making others feel unworthy of themselves.

I respect people that tell me the truth, no matter how hard it is.

People who are inclined to take the greatest challenges just settle for something less.

We meet people for a specific reason. They are either a blessing or a lesson.

Weak people see flaws in others where strong people see potential. What they really see is part of themselves.

You spend your whole life trying to fit in and when you finally do, you realize that you are surrounded by the very people who held you down.

Don’t wait for people to be kind, show them how.

It is ironic that it took so much time for people to realize your real value. They come knocking right when you have finally closed your door.

Every person has a bad habit naturally. But it is up to the person to decide whether to keep it or get rid of it.

There are two types of people, those who make an effort to reach their dreams and those who sit back and dream about their dreams.

Be that kind of person whose presence people would like to celebrate and not that of someone who had to be tolerated.

People want to get everything all at once, usually end up getting nothing in life.

A person usually has two reasons for doing a thing: one that sounds good and a real one.

People might not get all they work for in this world, but they certainly work for all they get.

Keep away from people who try to belittle your dreams. Small people always do that, but the really great ones make you feel that you too, can become great.

Be careful when you choose the people you can trust. Some of them are lions in a sheep’s skin.

You cannot move forward whilst carrying the burden of your previous life with you. Let go of the past and move on into the future.

Look around! People have faces with no smiles as they are carrying heavy baggage. Stop them! Give them a smile and see them light up.

Forgiveness sometimes comes a little too late, but just remember it is always ‘better late than never.’ 

Forgiveness is something we need to both give and ask for in return. Forgiveness is the economy of the heart, it saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, the waste of spirits.

Forgiveness is a gift you can give to someone else: it is an act of you own will.

Forgiveness is the key to letting go. Forgiveness isn’t about releasing him or her, it’s about releasing you.

You must forgive those who hurt you, if you don’t forgive, they have the power over you, forgiveness is for you and no one else. Forgiveness does not change the past, but it gives the future a chance.

Forgive others, not because they deserve forgiveness but because you deserve peace. If you agree.

There are few things in life that cannot be resolved with just kindness. Forgive the one that hurts you and you will find forgiveness back in some way or the other.

Forgiveness is nothing but recognizing the reality that what has happened has already happened and that there is no point allowing it to dominate the rest of your life.

Forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too. Forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time’.

Yes, so forgiveness is quite something isn’t it? The key I feel to move forward. No one is going to tell you it’s an easy process because it is not. But it is acknowledging a fact and making the choice to move forward in the right direction and leaving all the baggage behind of those who did it all wrong before. It starts on a personal level and then becomes a national, international and then a world issue. The thing is, it starts with you and in every walk of life itself. Why would you choose to keep dragging the garbage from the past with you when you can make a conscious choice to forgive, forget (or in other words process) and then take that step to move forwards?

This applies even to a mega subject like Climate Change. There is no point in trying to move forward until each and every one of us realizes that we have to work together on this particular issue and I really mean all of us. Change only comes in a positive way when synergy is involved. Synergy between opposites. Synergy between color, race and creed. Please let’s all stop wasting our time going on and on about things we know we should be doing differently, let’s just do it! No exceptions, all of us.

If we do it this way, there may be a flicker of hope that we can not only save ourselves, but also others, the planet and create a much better place for generations to come.

The process starts with you !!

And what better way to start than giving everyone LOVE.

That is what we need, what the world needs and then by working as one, we have some sort of hope of putting things right.


Did You Give the World Some Love Today, Baby

Did you give the world some love today babe?
Did you give the world some love today babe?
Well you gave me lots of love that’s true
You gave the world some loving too
You gave the world some love today babe

When you saw a weary man
Were you quick to realize
The thing he needed most
Was a kind look from your eyes
When you saw an angry face
And the faces that you scanned
Did you soften up a bit
With the flower from your hands

Oh your heart is always full of love babe
And you gave me lots of love today babe
Will you also keep the world in mind
Tell me what you did for all mankind
To give the world some love today babe

Everybody in this world has to do a whole lot more
Then love the one they spend a lifetime looking for
You just can’t keep your love in a cozy little shell
Got to love the one you know and a whole darn world as well

Everybody in this world has to do a whole lot more
Then love the one they spend a lifetime looking for
You just can’t keep your love in a cozy little shell
Got to love the one you know and a whole darn world as well

Got to make this one big loving world babe
Help to make this one big loving world babe
Well you gave me lots of love that’s true
You gave the world some loving too
You gave the world some love today babe
And you give the world some love today
And you give the world some love today
Did you give the world some love today
Did you give the world some love today
Did you give the world some love today

NORMAN L. MARTIN

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Lyrics licensed by LyricFind

Images: Google

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